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It wouldn’t have been so long, but I guess that’s what happens when you try to off yourself seven times in a row. But to be fair to me… okay, I got nothing, I just wanted to die. Even now, after having been released as ‘rehabilitated’ the pain really isn’t gone, I’m just able to cope. Of all the things I tried, I did find a few things that helped, nicotine and liquor… oh, and a lot of cock. Those are really the only things that I have found that help. That is, if I want to stay clean. I began. I stared at her for a moment, registering her statement. She had asked me about it before. I told her no sex until I was sure. I didn’t want to hurt her again. If something ever happened to her because of me….I would never be able to forgive myself.‘It would mean a lot to me’ I said, and shockingly I meant it.She stared at me doubtfully ‘are you just saying that?’‘As long as you don’t expect me to change’ I said shaking my headMy answer threw her off ‘what do you mean, i don’t want you to. She was, of course, worried. Not about being out, but that Billy-Ben might not meet her after all. He too had never snuck out on Full Moon Night (even at her age Jess-Belle couldn't help but think of the expedition as "sneaking out," as if she were still a schoolgirl fearing her parents' remonstrations), and he might lose his nerve. It wasn't the idea of waiting all night that bothered her so much as the long walk back to a lonely bed and another month of anxious nights. She was too old for. Some days later in the harem a bemused Nicola was discussing this with the Emir’s mother.“Of course you are a Princess, and your name means ‘virgin’,” said Zub, “Your son, Prince Ghasaan, has a very old Arab name of which I do not know the meaning.”“Does he have a British name?”“I expect you can call him what you like, but remember he may become Emir one day.”“Emir? Is that possible?”“He is seventh in line for the Throne,” came the reply, “so it seems unlikely, but that’s still quite high in.
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